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A Day in the Life of a Dom & Sub

illustration of a neck and torso with a collar and heart shaped lock on

 Welcome to our Day In The Life series, where we feature a snapshot into the personal lives of our community: the non-traditionalists, the kinksters, and anyone who has a story to tell. The writer of this piece wishes to remain anonymous.

 


 

It is morning, and as I stir, the surroundings begin flooding my senses. My eyes are squeezed tightly shut, but I can feel the sunlight forcing its way through my eyelids, urging me to awaken. I hear the chains that are locked around her ankles jingling as she shuffles to the kitchen to prepare my morning coffee. The coffee grinder begins buzzing away, adding to the symphony of sounds of the refrigerator door opening and shutting, and coffee cups knocking into one another. This is the music I awaken to every morning.

My bedroom door creaks open and I hear her daintily tip toe in, trying to keep the chains around her ankles from jingling too much as she nears the bed. Without opening my eyes, I stick my foot out from under the covers, dangling it off the bottom corner of the bed. 

“Good Morning Mistress” she whispers, before showering my foot in soft adoring kisses.

“Good morning pet,” I say groggily, finally opening my eyes to see her sweet little face staring back at me.

“Your coffee, Mistress,” she says, lowering her head and lifting her arms up into a “Serving” position, one of the many positions she has learned during her training as my submissive. As soon as I take the coffee from her hands, she transitions into a “Tabletop” position, making her body into a coffee table for me.

 

“Your coffee, Mistress,” she says, lowering her head and lifting her arms up into a “Serving” position, one of the many positions she has learned during her training as my submissive. As soon as I take the coffee from her hands, she transitions into a “Tabletop” position, making her body into a coffee table for me.

 

We have been working on her position training for months now, and this particular position has taken most of them to master. If there is the slightest curve in her back, the saucer might tip, spilling hot coffee all over her back, and worse, my white sheepskin rug! Thankfully, my pet has studiously practiced shallowing her breathing, tightening her core, and controlling her muscles so that her back remains perfectly straight, and the coffee unspilled. Being objectified in this way is one of the ways she shows her devotion to me.

 

Being objectified in this way is one of the ways she shows her devotion to me.

 

As I drink my coffee, we discuss our plans for the day. 

“I have some errands to run today, and while I am out I would like for you to clean the kitchen, and condition all of my leather implements. If these tasks are completed to my satisfaction, I will allow you to spit shine my boots upon my return. Does this sound like a reasonable expectation, pet?”

“Oh, yes Mistress,” she beams. I can tell by the glint in her eyes that she is already fantasizing about attending to my boots.

“Everything better be pristine if you want your reward, pet.”

“Yes, Mistress. Everything will be completed to your satisfaction.”

“If you play your cards right, you might just fall under that everything category…” I say as I turn my back to leave the room.

I can tell by the silence that the comment has gone right over her head, but as I close the door, I look back and smile, knowing that if she does as she has promised, this evening my pet will be moaning in ecstasy. Her wanting eyes looking back up at me, in adoration.

"Have a wonderful day Mistress," she says as the door closes. I expect that she will be waiting in posture, boots in hand, in that very spot when I return. ***

My pet has belonged to me for close to two years now. We have a Total Power Exchange relationship, meaning, we engage in consensual power exchange most of the time. It is our lifestyle, not just something we do in the bedroom. I never thought that I would end up in a total power exchange relationship, but over the two years that we've been together, we seem to organically be drawn into this hierarchy.

 

Most people would be surprised to hear that pet is NOT a pushover. In fact, she works at one of the most cutthroat law firms in our city. 

 

In order to do this safely and ethically, we must check in on equal footing regularly. Most people would be surprised to hear that pet is NOT a pushover. In fact, she works at one of the most cutthroat law firms in our city. Pet knows not only how to advocate for herself, but that it is imperative in order for this arrangement to work.

 

She craves submission because it helps her to feel balanced and focused in a chaotic world. The structure and safe container of our power dynamic gives her a routine, predictability, and control. 

 

She craves submission because it helps her to feel balanced and focused in a chaotic world. The structure and safe container of our power dynamic gives her a routine, predictability, and control. Isn't it ironic how surrender can sometimes be the only way we maintain control in our lives?

 


 

If you would like to contribute to our Day In The Life stories, please send an email to  with the subject line "DITL pitch". Please include a bit about yourself, your relationship, and anything else that might be relevant. You do not need to be an established writer to contribute.  The piece can be anonymous. Day In The Life stories are paid writing opportunities. Kindly note, we are not able to respond to all pitches.

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